From Debt to $400k Savings: Breaking Poor Money Habits | Tom Ferry Podcast Experience
It doesn’t matter how much you make…. Breaking poor money habits and building healthy ones is the only thing that will get you the financial freedom you want.
Money is hard to talk (or even think) about for a lot of people. It’s complicated and uncomfortable, and our spending habits often stem from our earliest experiences. But if you want to conquer any debt you may have and start saving MASSIVE amounts of money, it starts with breaking poor money habits and replacing them with wise ones.
In this episode of the Tom Ferry Podcast Experience, I’m talking with Valerie Upham and Emily Terrell, both of whom know the stress and hardship that come from massive debt. They’ll explain what it takes to break poor money habits and transform your financial future. Valerie will even take you through her journey of going from a mountain of debt to $400k in savings.
As you’ll learn, there’s hardly a point in making more money until you’re capable of spending, saving, and managing your money in the right way – so watch or listen here to learn how.
Interested in a FREE Coaching Consultation? Click Here:
For the majority of my life, I’ve been passionate and dedicated to changing lives by giving away the very best strategies, tactics, and mindset techniques to help you and your business succeed. Join me as we take this to level 10!
In this episode, we discuss…
0:00 – About Valerie & Emily
3:18 – Early money experiences
6:38 – The moment of financial realization
8:55 – The power of focus
10:08 – The adjustments necessary
12:52 – Stress changes confidence
15:20 – Necessary changes
17:40 – Evaluating finances
20:00 – Lead gen and personalization
22:28 – Getting serious about money
29:40 – 115 days
30:50 – First steps to eliminating debt
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Are we ready? Okay, so everybody knows uh Emily and I Maine Valerie Valer. So when you like when you want to boom a point. So the one thing to always be mindful of when we're podcasting is don't be like the first time I saw Mike Nest from Social Distortion doing this Okay, that's all I heard the entire time. Okay, he was definitely on heroin.

It was a great show though. my brother, my brother's B Open up B Southern California La band called Social Distortion Okay and literally the guy was just jamming you like that's all we heard Co Somebody needs to grab that guy and do this. so it's it's. always my reminder to everybody like talk in the microphone.

You got to get a little creepier close to it than you think. Okay, so like like like on it where you're almost touching it. hello there, hello bedroom welome to Tom after hey welcome back to the podcast It It feels like it's been a day. Um but I'm so excited about today's show.

We have been discussing this for quite some time. I am obsessed as they talk about this year at the Summit that for the last two decades I've been helping real estate professionals sell a lot of houses, operationalize your business become great. Brands Great brands do great marketing and make a lot of money. And the thing that is frustrated me is the number of people that take that cash and somehow blow it all.

Don't save, don't put themselves in a position to win. So I made the the claim at the Summit that I was going to spend the next decade helping people make better decisions psychologically and physically with their cash so they can put themselves in a position to retire. But you and I Valerie have been in the discussion for a while. Emily you and I have been in the discussion, but very quickly Val is the star of the show.

Tell them who you are and then we'll do a little introduction and then we want to talk about your journey. So for my friend that's listening. If you know someone that was a real estate agent or is a real estate agent or salesperson who got themselves in debt, thought they could never get out of it, had a moment and flipped that from paying off their debt to $100,000 in savings to $400,000 in savings, then this is the right show for you. So Valerie give him a little backstory: Who are you? Where do you work? How long you been in the business? Sure I'm Valerie Upam I'm in San Diego California and I will.

My 20- year anniversary is this: January as a real estate agent and I have a small team. There's two agents and I have a marketing coordinator and a virtual assistant and then another part-time gal that really makes a difference for the team. I Love it All that sounds expensive and today we're talking about debt reduction and saving more money. But I love it.

Um, so Emily you've been on the show before. Great coach with us for the people that don't have contacts for, give her a quick like who are you, where you're from? What do you do? Sure! So I'm Coach Emily Terell I Uh. started in real estate about eight years ago and I started coaching two years ago. um I Absolutely love it I Do speak, speak for the company Now you might know that.

but I do I do speak for the company? Shout out to the speaker Bureau just a little bit. um and I I'm a mom and I travel not only for speaking but I absolutely love to travel. It's my one guilty pleasure of seeing everything that I can I love it I Love it. Well all right.

So so Valerie I think the person listening right now is is now thinking like okay, wait a minute, this is sounding like me So give us the backstory like how did you create the $60,000 in debt and then we're going to get into the details of like the psychology around the decisions you had to made, how you created some accountability around it. but how did you first just get into that much debt growing up? Um, my mother would get us everything that we needed by writing a check and she would you know, always check the mailbox for that non-sufficient funds notice from the bank and it was just paycheck after paycheck and she would just buy because we needed something. Yes, and um was she buying stuff that you needed or was she buying stuff that you wanted? cuz when you're a kid there's a big difference I'd say both it was school pictures it was I went to Catholic School um my parents were divorced when I was a baby. so I'd go with my dad on weekends and he would barely pay child support and my mom was I had a stepdad and she lived outside of her means 100% And I'm the youngest of five kids.

Okay so it was just she. we we went to a really nice school private school and all the other kids had more and so um you know everything like I said down to school photos and needing new shoes and want she wanted us to have the best. Yes, so we didn't you know? So and we but we had TV dinners for dinner. sure and um it was.

Everything looked good on the outside but really we didn't have. you know it was Check to Check I'd be curious for the person listening right now and I'd love your backstory as well. Think about what is your earliest childhood memory of money and how that impacts the decisions that we continue to make in most cases completely completely unconscious. like we're unconscious to the early memories and how that really shaped our reality when it comes to money.

Do you have an early backstory on money? You want to share? Sure. So my my childhood was very similar, but my parents were also divorced and they had two different views of money. My mom, single mom had barely any money and we lived very you know, single wide trailer. We didn't have anything but what I didn't realize is as I got older, she actually started creating a shopping habit for herself and so she had a ton of secret debt that we weren't aware of and so you know it was learning it was.

It was unusual because I learned to be Thrifty and save but then also I had the opposite of when I found out later that she wasn't saving as much as we thought she was actually secretly spending it because she would go and buy you know, a $100 pair of jeans for $75 cuz they were on sale or even $50 cuz they were on clearance. but you didn't need the jeans, she didn't need to spend the 5075 at all. she could have just not so. And then my dad was the opposite.

very similar to Valerie he. his love language is acts of service and acts of service meant Oh I'll just buy everything. That was my mom too. She would buy us things to show us that she loved us.

Yes, yeah, same thing and except he didn't have the money either. So I didn't have great role models when it came to actually Building Wealth and staying in a place where I didn't have to live paycheck to paycheck, It was just not a great role model for me on any side. Yes, so I've unpacked all this and and I think all of our stories are similar. So let's let's transition to at at what moment did you have that sort of Awakening that moment of awareness where you were like this is stupid or whatever you know, whatever you said to yourself, what was that moment? Sure.

So I was at Elite Retreat in Palm Desert back in the day and every time I would go to one of your events primarily. Elite Retreat You always talk about money and I would just wait for that moment and you talked about what was possible. And I'm a visual person. So I used to listen to Mark Victor Hansen and Jack Canfield visualizing is realizing and so I had been listening to those tapes all through my 20s.

Now I'm in my 30s I'm going to your coaching program and you're talking about money and what's possible and I never really. you said things that I had never even imagined were possible for me and every time you continue to do that and I continue to listen, right? So it's really important that you continue to do that. I Promise the Um and you talked about the possibility of saving $100,000 and to me, that was an impossibility. So sitting in that room, you said, who here would like to save $100,000 So I raised my hand and you selected me and at that time I had 60,000 in debt and that was a secret.

like my husband didn't even know that that's what kind of debt that we had sure and I you know I was making good money. we were doing fine, you know, paying the bills but the debt just kept accumulating and so I raised my hand and it was a challenge. Now that was in 2016 and it took me two and a half years before I finally saved that $100,000 and I'd go to your to the I'd go to a summit and I'd hide from you because I knew the year later I didn't do it in a year's time I' be like where's Valerie where's Valerie yes but then when I finally did it I called my financial adviser and I said I need you to move this money to this account CU I wanted it all to be in One account so without you purposely doing it, you were holding me accountable CU I said I would do it So my word was really important to me and when I got it I went up to show you the show you the statement and then I thought oh good I'm done I got it I got to 100,000 and then Tom said okay, what's next let's go for 150,000 I thought oh my God but I've done it Yes, right And so the psychology around that was taking the small steps. MH you talked about incorp operating your business so in California I became an Es Corp I took that step.

You then said open up the the business accounts I did that. Um, then you said take 10% take 10% and put that into the savings account. So I did the small steps Yes and they felt like big steps in the moment. But if you stay focused and you just you write down these are the things.

These are the steps that I need to take. You can get there and it's one at a time and it's every paycheck and it's intentional and I recently asked Tom how do you do this like his lifestyle and all the energy that he has and he said focus and anytime I have focused on something because I really really wanted it I've achieved it and oftentimes I will lose my focus. but when you know what you want, you just stay on track. You can get there.

Even in this market. in 2023, the market has shifted. When I first started doing this, it was 2016 and it was definitely not the market of 21 and 22. So it's very significant to know what you want.

So and knowing what you want is really the first step, so there's a lot. There's a lot to unpack there. The first thing is to acknowledge that if you go from $60,000 in debt to $100,000 it really is about $300,000 in actual Revenue that has to be created because you got to pay taxes. Then you got to pay off the debt.

Now you're at zero. Now you got to get to a 100. So did your did your work ethic change? Did the way you viewed your daily disciplines? Did your marketing change? Did did other things around you adjust? Or was it just the Declaration that I can do this and you set up the accounts the right way? My probably most watched video on YouTube Thank you. If you've ever seen it setting up your accounts, organizing.

Hey, this money goes to taxes. It's not mine. This goes to the house. This goes to run my business.

This goes to savings. You did that. But what changed from your daily marketing activities that caused the acceleration in Revenue So I used I didn't want to be on a budget because to me a budget was limiting and I don't have a limited mindset. So it's kind of like having a diet.

A lot of people focus on what you can't have, but when you focus on what you can have, there's a lot of great tasting vegetables. There's like there's a lot of great food, but when you focus on what you can't have, it's harder. It's a bigger struggle. So instead of focusing on something I couldn't have I focused on what it was that I wanted and it that mindset changed.

Also, my average price um for real estate sales was 600,000 and I wanted to double it and so part of you. you can save money right? But the easiest way to save money is to make more so I also focused on what can I do to double my price? My price point. Um, who else can I help what other conversations can I have and that's why that's relevant for today, right? Because it is hard work. But if you're doing something that you enjoy, it doesn't have to be hard, it just has to to be focused.

So when you hear this coach what goes through your mind because this is this is one of the great and and and maybe first of all we should be doing this. Yeah, good job you know what I mean like standing o on the podcast. it's one of the great examples of making a decision, creating a plan, keeping it simple, all these cliche things that everyone you everyone writes down and we see quote cards on. But what most people don't understand is progress looks like this: Nothing, nothing, nothing, Nothing Nothing Nothing Nothing Nothing Nothing nothing and all of a sudden Boom right? And and here you are from 2016 to 2023 with you know, nearly a half a million dollars Cash saved.

No debt 400,000 right? But that's close, right? Like $400,000 saved. Which we know in the state of California or New York if you lived in Canada Essentially half of every dollar you bring in goes to taxes. so you're creating a lot of Revenue Now what are you thinking Honestly What? what? I'd like to know and this may be really personal but having the debt what what did it cause you for as far as stress like how did that change? How did your life change? Because for me stress is a major part and we've talked about like anxiety and and things that have go with me personally. So how did it change for you when you actually got to just let go of the debt and then switch you attract more people.

So my confidence changed. Pivot was a huge part of that in 2020. Um so when you don't have money and you're working with a client and you're waiting for that next paycheck, it impacts your relationship with that client and you don't even know it. So I would wait for a paycheck and early on right? and that transaction would fall through because I was so focused on the money and somehow I didn't Not that I was aware of, but it interfered with the transaction.

It's how I look at it when you focus on the client. Then the money comes and when my debt was paid off I'm Freer and I'm not worried about money and so I'm out just helping people and it it really shines through. and then people want to work with you when you're fearful and and I you know I continue to go through that pattern right? So right now the market has shifted and it's it's scary. It's like okay, where where are my next clients going to come from and then I catch myself and I say okay I can't go there I just have to focus on I have to.

You know where I'm going and who I'm going to help and not focus on me so much and then it works out. It's a weird thing that money is like one of these weird things that people have such strange associations to. right? Like like Catholic School Catholic School Money is the root of all evil. Like really? Then why does the Catholic Church have more money than anyone else on the planet and have all the real estate holdings? Like maybe there's a story there or or you start to realize that money is just a tool, right? But for some people, the obsession over money becomes and that could be positive, positive or negative.

SE Setion right? like I Have to get this deal closed. Now it's about you. It's not about the buyer. It's not about the seller.

It's not about the mortgage. It's not about you know who you're dealing with. It's just you. You need a check versus like hey, I'm obsessed with like making money because I want to contribute more and I want to be able to help more people.

It's just a weird thing. So did you get your answer to the question like like how did the stress get relieved and how did it show up Oh yeah, well and also so now that you know what you know, how is it affecting your business now because as you mentioned, 2016 was a different Market we're in a completely different market. so what are you doing now to make sure that you can continue your growth and not inadvertently spend all your $400,000 and put yourself back into debt? So what are you changing? So my husband said to me on on my way here he's like, you know he's said we're going to stop spending money because I'm really worried I don't know how much money you're spending and I just ordered the eight bed so you know driving tonight oh my God I love it. So um Today's Show is brought to you by eight sleep Tom Fair's a fan with no promo code but I own two of them I love it.

Excited so but he's like we need to you know, slow down. Um Christmas is coming. We have two kid. one kid is a senior in high school.

um a daughter in college. So all these things right and the economy changing expenses? Yes, yes and so what I'm doing right now and I'm in the middle of it is I'm looking at all of my expenses again I'm going back to my credit cards I'm looking at audible do I really need it I have six credits right now on Audible and so I'm like I I'm just going to buy six more books I'm going to shut down Audible for that $15 a month and so I'm going to look at all those small things. It's the oh, shoot, was going to quote um, somebody's dad she said it's the twos and the did I write it down. It doesn't matter, but it's in the Starbucks right? It's those small purchases.

I Had a financial adviser once tell me people prepare for the big purchases. They prepare for the washer, a dryer, or a new car. but they don't It's the small dollars that just thr out $8 of Dunkin Donuts every day for like five straight years. Yep.

Interrupting my own show with a quick little announcement: If you're like me and you recognize this is the time of the year when we've got to make decisions. We got to look back at what's worked in the past and decide what we want to have happen in 2024, then yes, it is time for you to get your plan together. Now if you're one of my coaching clients, you know you just go inside a loom. You download the 2024 plan.

You and your coach work on that together. If you're not one of my clients, go to There's be a link below. Download a copy the plan, get to work on it, Use chat GPT and other resources to answer the tough questions about the strategies you need to implement to ensure your success in 2024. So get your business plan and let's get to work.

Now let's go back to the show. So have you heard of the concept of figuring out 20% of the work that you do? That gets you 80% of your business? Absolutely. so. Have you thought about pushing that concept into what to your business Now figuring out 20% of your expenses that are truly funding? I I am in the middle of evaluating and and it's no fun, right? But what do you mean? Okay, I think it's I think it's fun to be like that doesn't work, Kill it that doesn't work, Kill it.

I have so IDE more at it right I want to do this and I want to do this and I have to. So I have to cut back right, slow down and focus and priorization. If you notice the message of this. this broadcast is focus, focus.

So I'm looking at where am I spending my time I'm looking at where am I spending my money and I have to just break it down and I have to get really serious about that For 2024, how are you doing that? Okay, what numbers are you using or at least how are you organizing to where you understand this is working? This is not. Yes, Yeah! So I'm looking at and again I'm in the process. so I haven't finished this but I'm looking at my transactions from this year and where did I where did the clients come from? where did I meet them? Okay, what am I going to focus on in 2024? So I have to look at who I'm working with then I have to look at what money am I spending for those categories so I have a farm um I do teacher pop buys I also my I have a demographic farm and a geographic Farm I also work with seniors and I there's all these things I want to do and so I need to just stop say okay, what am I spending on this pillar, this pillar and so forth and then see where my money's really coming from and I'm gonna have to cut things out right? or I'm gonna I'm gonna say the big not cut where I spend my time see I think it's that it is. Most of us miss like in the early days of my business.

when I started 20 years ago it was very clear like I had money and I could have invested every dollar and I did I had $52,000 a month the day I started with no Revenue but I was super clear Sweat Equity was how I was going to get there. so I said to myself rather than you know, complicated email campaigns, building new functioning websites which we I just said, let's just do the bare minimum of what I have to do. but what I'm going to do is I'm going to get on the phone I'm going to book appointments and I'm going to go see people and do that three times a day and do it every day for the first three years and you wake up and you're like holy I've a really good business and and a great profit so so I'm curious. like when you think about like, okay, I'm going to make these Cuts it's it's always smart.

but remember, like we know, when you cut marketing, it's it's sometimes very hard to recover from that, especially when you have an established Farm an established base of clients, You've created this tribe of seniors as an example. So so if you're gonna adjust the dollars, you need to massively adjust your Sweat Equity and how you spend time with those people. Absolutely. I'm planning coffee meetings.

Good, that's that's in my business plan. It's free I me. you know. basically and you're spending time one-onone that's my.

that's where I Shine is when I'm with people I care about people I listen to them and you connect with people. And when you connect with people, then right, you know, right, real estate comes out of that as well I Love the one-on-one I would challenge I'd challenge everybody to think about how you go one to many like one-on-one is is like the mega. The mega Trend right now Beyond like AI everywhere is personalization, right? It's like sending people say hey, let your home values have gone up that's great. But if I send you a Zillow text of yours estimate and I say Valerie I was thinking about you today I was on Zillow This is what it's saying.

What do you think about this price that engagement like right now that's generating 5% conversion to a listing appointment across like a couple hundred thousand of those text messages that our clients have sent. So personalization. But then on the flip side I know if you got in front of 25 seniors versus One MH 25 people in your farm versus one. the impact is is geometric so how do you do that? So I'm doing seller seminars marine and J off.

absolutely and so. but I used to do seller seminars way. my dad died in 2018 and so I was really focused on working with our older adults at that time working in. Senior Communities doing presentations, partnering with uh, elder law attorneys and um, and I stopped for a while right for what I just said and then now I'm getting back into that.

So I've already got the relationships with the senior community with nursing homes, skilled nursing Assisted Living independent living communities and I do presentations. So I've done that and I'm starting that again. but then in my community I'm doing the seller seminars I've done two this year so I've got the ground workor now I need to go forward. So in 2024 I'm starting in January because everything's You know people are with their families and they're not going to as many in in the fall, so that's my focus.

Good You didn't know this. this podcast was going to become a dual coaching session. Okay, so I want to go back to the money for a second? So we talked about the decision right back in 201. Um, what was the early conversation you had to have with your spouse? Or did you there you go? Uh no.

My husband and I don't talk about money a lot. Oh interesting, yeah, he knows that we're good and he knows and I'll show him hey look look how much money we had and and I asked him before I came on the show I'm like so I know I'm going to be asked about you so he just said that he knows he's grateful that we have as much money as we've saved and we have Investments as well. this is just EST and um but he said he I know we could be spending so much more and he also came I'm soring so much yeah thank you but he also comes from a family. he's the youngest of four and he early on I said honey, let's create a budget.

He's like okay, great, we just will eat Top Ramen and we'll spend nothing and I'm like no, that's not no and and so and neither of us really know how to live by a budget. You can create it and put it on paper, but to live by a budget's different. So when he said that, I'm like for get it, no, you're out I'm not including you in this conversation. So the so no, we didn't talk about it I think I I mean I did tell him hey honey I'm going to save 100,000 and he's like okay, great, yeah, you know, just let me know when that happens, What do you? What do you say to the person that's listening that is like my spouse and I we engage similarly right? like you know I kind of say I'm going to do this and my spouse is like yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever, like and and your spouse loves you.

It's just money is one of those like my mentor. Mike Vance would always say sex, politics, money, religion. That's all I want to talk about but nobody wants to discuss it because it just it's taboo for a lot of people. But I think money is as a couple.

it's one of the most important conversations and there's no there's no right or wrong. Like my wife can take a dollar and somehow squeeze a buck 25 out of it, right? Like That's just how she operates where I'm like let's take that dollar and figure out how to make seven, 8, 10, 15 and do it 5,000 times over and over again. we are Polar Opposites with money but we found agreement we found Common Ground How did you and your husband really? well? We're both very independent, you know he we just do activities differently. Yeah, and we're okay with that.

Yeah, and he trust me which is is a great thing and he also doesn't like. He tried to help file the tax returns this year and he he's like like honey I tried he's like I can't so he just gave it back to me. He just doesn't like to deal with the details. it's it's just not him.

Yeah, but he's He's great with other details of course, right? And and you mentioned that people don't want to talk about many sex religion right? but they they don't talk about it but they want to and that's another reason I Wanted to do this podcast is because I want people to be able to talk more freely about money I I Thought we were going to say sex that's didn't you say that's Tomberry after dark I Couldn't help it I'm sorry welcome to the show So I want people to be able to talk more about money I did a money Mastermind for a year and not in a Bravado way. not in a look at me in my Lamborghini that I don't own and a photo of me in front of it like honest conversations about saving, investing, discipline, changing your psychology. So your Mastermind So on this journey I've had people join my my Mastermind um webinar I guess Zoom call and a lot of people would show up and then a few people and it was interesting that what people would share with me about their Journey yeah and initially I started it because I wanted to show people how to pay off debt and so everybody would show up for that and then the more people would show up. they want to learn how to invest money, they're like well what do I do next and I realized I don't have the tools for that and so I would bring in Specialists my CPA my financial adviser and it still didn't take me down the path that I wanted.

There are people other people like myself who have you know 60,000 50,000, 20,000 in debt more and then there's people who have saved it that I know they were ahead of the game and wanting to help other people to save money. and now that one of my friends, her husband lost his job and then now she's back into debt and so it doesn't just because you have it doesn't mean that you stay there. So you really have to create a habit in how you, how you save and what you spend money on in your choices. Because it can.

It can get you. and and I would even argue too. Like for every business owner, one of the number one reasons number top four or five is said number one one of the top I Think we all know collectively. I I I have a slide.

that sort of punches a little humor at this. I say most real estate agents in accounting n not that great, but you all seem to figure out how to do two and a half% of $375,900 like bang. You got that number down. but we need more awareness around forecasting.

Hey, we're back into a regular Market where typically the fourth quarter is going to be slower. we might have closings, but those are a lagging indicator from what happened in the you know, the third quarter, the first Quarter: if you're in the Northeast or most of most of the world, it's going to be slower until the Spring Market. So what what we see in like in The Brokerage World and large teams is the fourth quarter and the first quarter are not starvation. but they're really you got to be super mindful of your budget because all your money is in the second and third quarter.

Most people don't think that way. Most people want the check right now. What can I do to get Will I'm my dader back 201 and at the end of 2017? um I did really well in real estate and then um, but in 18 was when he was really sick and I lost him in September of 2018. So in 2018 I would um go to his chemo appointment I I'd be working as he's doing his treatment and then I'd have family time and then I'd be really focused on work time and I split the two and I thought wow I've got this down.

This is great I just need to split my time right in 2019 after he died I did Less business than I had in years and it was because I wasn't out with people and so when I at the end of 18 when I did great in 18 the year that he passed I thought I could do both and um, but I wasn't out with people so it it's lagging. it hit me in 19 and all the business I did in 18 was because of all the relationships that I had focused on in 17, right? So what you're doing now will impact you Nine, uh, 3 months, 90 days from now, six months from now, and a lot of people right now are slowing down because they're frustrated and they're You know, people aren't selling, people aren't buying, but it's the relationships that you're making right now that are going to impact your spring market and a lot of people may not start until January because they're tired and they're beat up. and I felt beat up recently and was very discouraged and so I get it. But then you just have to pick yourself back up and you just have to get back out there and start those coffee meetings and and that will.

It'll just carry you through. Yeah and coffee meetings is whatever you you know, whatever you do calling making your calls. So I'll give you uh, a very analytical number for you to think about all of us and that is right now. If I study, let's just take every one of my large clients that has a large number of past clients.

centers of influence, online leads, Openhouse leads Geographic farming just across the board. Let's just call it potential clients. It's 115 days from the day you meet them until you put them in Esro 115 days. So every day you don't do a coffee meeting every day you don't make your phone calls every day, you don't send the email you push off signing a contract for 115 days on average 100 and I'm just I'm baffled by how many people you hear me and you go.

Yes, that makes sense I understand the deal I have today I Met, you know, five six months ago, but on average I get it's 115 days but I don't feel like making my phone calls today I don't feel like going on coffee and I want to lovingly just punch you in the throat and say no one cares how you feel right if you want to serve your family, If you want to get out of debt, if you want to save more money, if you want to put yourself in a better position, you have to start doing things that other people avoid because that's where all the money is like. My job is help people do what they avoid right? Like That's all it right As a coach? Yeah, okay so my little rant as we as we wrap this up: Closing thoughts From you you on on: the person that is in debt that wants to get out of debt. Start with the numbers, figure out what debt you're truly in. If you don't know where you are right now, you're not going to be able to plan for the future effectively.

So start with a realistic look of where you're at. From there, you can plan. Yeah, it's why we start business plans with what we did this year, right? right? So we can know where to go. Yep, assess where you're at, what are your assets, what are your opportunities, what are your threats, and then go from there.

Closing thoughts on: save more money, Get out of debt. You talked about making your calls and not feeling like it. The one thing that has stopped me here and there is when I When I think about what I'm going to do next. You just you just got to make the plan and do it because this if you get in your head, it's going to slow you down and so I used to like I'd hear Money conversations and a book on money and you know and somehow I would walk out of the seminar at that time CU I got a phone call for a client and I would miss the money conversation that I needed to hear.

So pull yourself or you know, find conversations about money listen to Dave Ramsey the debt snowball. That's how I got out of debt was by paying off the small little bills so that I felt good about it and then I was like oh, I'm that much closer I'm that much closer so that was The Total Money Makeover book was what helped me also I love it I love it. Shout out to Dave Ramsey All right so my advice is similar. I would get it up in visual I would have a conversation with my spouse if I'm not married I' have a conversation with my kids.

What we know today is if we're trying to develop a habit they got a 3% chance of ever fulfilling on that where 85% of the people that succeed they succeed because they go hello my name is Tom and I'm an alcoholic and they show up to a meeting hello I'm at Weight Watchers and I want to lose weight hello I've got a coach and I want to create some accountability hello my name is Valerie I Want to help everybody do the same thing I did when you created that Mastermind What you did is you created the 85% chance, right? You got probably the greatest benefit of that Mastermind Because you were talking about it all the time, right? It was in your ethos. You were sharing it with people. So for the person listening right now, you got to ask yourself, it's it's not. It's not just get a coach, it is.

How can I create more structure around paying off my debt and saving more money? My wife and I when we first got married our little place in Newport little little funny little condo. we wrote out all of our debt and she had secret debt and she was like okay, you want you want the balance here here we go I Got this one and this one and this one I was like holy crow but we were able to pay that off in 18 months and and we did kind of eat Top Ramen but that's it was Italian food so it it was the Italian equivalent. Lots of pasta, no meatballs. but the bottom line was having that conversation creating that structure.

That's where you get the behavior set you've got to. You got to do it with people. You can't do it alone That That would be my advice. So Valeries we wrap this up.

If somebody wants to find you, could they go find you on Instagram Absolutely send you a fax like how do they reach you I do have a fax machine I'm kidding. so um Valerie upam for Instagram and my phone number I You know if anybody ever wants to call me if you want a Total Money Makeover book I've I've bought books for people because I really want people to start and pay off their debt and if you want to talk about your money journey and it's you know confidentially I'm happy to talk with you and help you get on your path. So um, it's very valuable. So I would say DM you on Instagram right? That'd be the best way to do it.

So this was great. Thank you so much for listening. Share this with a friend or two that might need to hear this message. Maybe it's your spouse, Maybe it's your kid, Maybe it's your brother, Maybe it's your best friend inside the office who seems to always have a spending habit.

So let's help more people. Thanks so much for watching. We'll see you guys on the next show. Take care.

By Stock Chat

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