This is my struggle with social anxiety, and how I became an extrovert - as an introvert - enjoy! Add me on Instagram: GPStephan
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I’m sure a big misconception people have about me is that I’m like this extroverted people-person who shouldn’t have any problem whatsoever socially…and that’s very, very wrong.
In fact, the person you see today is something I’ve worked YEARS on to cultivate and build up to…because I’m not NATURALLY that outgoing, or social, even though it might seem like that on YouTube. Deep down, I’m pretty reserved, I don’t like being the center of attention, I get nervous in big crowds, I suddenly become hyper aware of everything I’m doing, and I’m very much an introvert.
But despite that, I’ve really made an effort not to let that get in the way, slow me down, negatively impact my life, and hinder my ability to otherwise put myself out there…so this is my story, how I was able to overcome it, and my advice for anyone else out there who’s maybe feeling similar to myself.
Here are a few really easy strategies that made it INCREDIBLY easy to make new friends:
The first was straight from the book: how to win friends and influence people, which encouraged you to be inquisitive about the other person - because people LOVE talking about themselves. I loved this strategy, too - because it took all the pressure off of myself, and I could just stand there and let the other person do all of the work.
Or another one was simply just acknowledging the situation for what it is…sometimes I’ll just flat out say “Hey, I’m Graham…I don’t know anyone here, I feel super weird about it, but I figured I’d just introduce myself so I’m not that random dude standing in the corner.” BAM. Everyone’s been there, everyone can relate to that, so they’ll immediately just open up to you because you were honest.
I also realized that people REALLY respect you for fully just embracing yourself, almost no matter how you act. As long as you are unapologetically yourself, people LOVE that - because pretty much everyone, deep down, is afraid of being their true selves…so when they see someone else doing it, it makes them feel incredibly comfortable because there is no “fakeness” or “front” - what you see is what you get. So fully embrace who you are, or any weird things about you - and that’ll work in your favor.
So if you’ve ever felt the same way, or ever felt stuck like you don’t know what to do - just know, it gets better, but you’re going to have to make an effort to improve things. Start saying YES more often, go to local meet ups to things you’re interested in, try reconnecting with old friends, and start doing that regularly…it doesn’t mean that you have to turn into this crazy social person, but it does mean that you can adapt as needed and not let that get in the way of you becoming your best self.
For business or one-on-one real estate investing/real estate agent consulting inquiries, you can reach me at GrahamStephanBusiness @gmail.com
The YouTube Creator Academy:
Learn EXACTLY how to get your first 1000 subscribers on YouTube, rank videos on the front page of searches, grow your following, and turn that into another income source: https://bit.ly/2STxofv $100 OFF WITH CODE 100OFF
Get 2 Free Stocks on WeBull when you deposit $100 (Valued up to $1000): https://act.webull.com/k/Vowbik9Tm5he/main
My ENTIRE Camera and Recording Equipment:
https://www.amazon.com/shop/grahamstephan?listId=2TNWZ7RP1P1EB
I’m sure a big misconception people have about me is that I’m like this extroverted people-person who shouldn’t have any problem whatsoever socially…and that’s very, very wrong.
In fact, the person you see today is something I’ve worked YEARS on to cultivate and build up to…because I’m not NATURALLY that outgoing, or social, even though it might seem like that on YouTube. Deep down, I’m pretty reserved, I don’t like being the center of attention, I get nervous in big crowds, I suddenly become hyper aware of everything I’m doing, and I’m very much an introvert.
But despite that, I’ve really made an effort not to let that get in the way, slow me down, negatively impact my life, and hinder my ability to otherwise put myself out there…so this is my story, how I was able to overcome it, and my advice for anyone else out there who’s maybe feeling similar to myself.
Here are a few really easy strategies that made it INCREDIBLY easy to make new friends:
The first was straight from the book: how to win friends and influence people, which encouraged you to be inquisitive about the other person - because people LOVE talking about themselves. I loved this strategy, too - because it took all the pressure off of myself, and I could just stand there and let the other person do all of the work.
Or another one was simply just acknowledging the situation for what it is…sometimes I’ll just flat out say “Hey, I’m Graham…I don’t know anyone here, I feel super weird about it, but I figured I’d just introduce myself so I’m not that random dude standing in the corner.” BAM. Everyone’s been there, everyone can relate to that, so they’ll immediately just open up to you because you were honest.
I also realized that people REALLY respect you for fully just embracing yourself, almost no matter how you act. As long as you are unapologetically yourself, people LOVE that - because pretty much everyone, deep down, is afraid of being their true selves…so when they see someone else doing it, it makes them feel incredibly comfortable because there is no “fakeness” or “front” - what you see is what you get. So fully embrace who you are, or any weird things about you - and that’ll work in your favor.
So if you’ve ever felt the same way, or ever felt stuck like you don’t know what to do - just know, it gets better, but you’re going to have to make an effort to improve things. Start saying YES more often, go to local meet ups to things you’re interested in, try reconnecting with old friends, and start doing that regularly…it doesn’t mean that you have to turn into this crazy social person, but it does mean that you can adapt as needed and not let that get in the way of you becoming your best self.
For business or one-on-one real estate investing/real estate agent consulting inquiries, you can reach me at GrahamStephanBusiness @gmail.com
Great words Graham! This video is so relatable and inspiring. You give really good advice here that anyone can put into work quickly and easily.
Things are so different in my community 🥺
Thank you for this, this has been my biggest fear getting into real estate is that i'm awkward at meeting new people..
I get angry 😠 when I approach people.
I do frown 🙁 when I'm looking others.
I'm not rude:
It's a way to deflect my shyness 🤣✌️
Just saw this video come up in the recommendation today, I've seen some of your more recent videos and I liked them but I got to say this video is really good and I actually own a copy of "How to win friends and influence people" but never read it I'm going to start reading it. hopefully it will help myself I'll come back and let you know how it goes, although you probably won't see this because well its a three year old video but thank you anyway.
Going through this so bad right now
This explains my situation pretty much one to one. Got licensed at 18 and jumped in as soon as I could, and pretty much every friend went to college.
Thank you so much for this video 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 I can relate to every single thing that you mentioned, subscribed and liked
There is one way to overcome social anxiety = stop being a pussy.
I feel nervous talking to people and the camera, but I try to overcome the feeling with both. Thank you for doing this!
I share many of the same issues, I can still be lonely in a crowded room. thanks for the tips !!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m 17 and your describing my life detail by detail
This is great advice. Thank you. I’ve felt the maturity gap in friendship for a while now, especially at 21. Topics like finances is something that makes me eager to exchange ideas and learn, where a lot of other 20/21 year olds aren’t, so the self development & financial topics are usually better maintained with 25+ year olds. I hope to find more friends with a focus on strong finances and personal/professional development as time progresses.
Thank you Graham
I like this stuff better than your more recent main channel content.
This is really good advice. Find like minded people with some similar interests. Even adults can do this.
Thanks for your vulnerability. Never expected that you struggled with social anxiety. Great tips
Hi Graham so I been watching your channel for a while it’s very entertaining and valuable. But what’s interesting to me is I just watched a video with you ‘ do all millionaires think the same’ and I think you behaved there a bit introverted but on your channel you come accross very extrovert.
Oops just watching a the video you answered it 🤦🏼♀️
Thanks for sharing this graham so inspirational💕
Yoire a good communicator, great story teller … I would imagine you would be an interesting person to hang out with. Not as cool as your cat, but still somewhat interesting.
A HUGE THANK YOU❤️❤️❤️
Same I moved to a different school in 8th grade then went to high school with old friends and couldn’t connect
Hey I don’t ever comment on anything but… I want to thank you for this I’m exactly the same way! I’m an introvert. I actually love my alone time I’ve spent years alone figuring out who I am, there is legit so much you can learn and I get lost in that actually right now I’m reading that book how to make friends and influence people and the newer one with social media and I’m obsessed! I’m an artist and I have been so lost in myself I need to branch out and get my art out there. Well anyways I just wanted to say thanks for sharing bc I legit know how that all feels and makes me feel better there is others out there like me🙏🤘🏼. Hope you all the best I legit love your channels I just started watching like a week ago and I’ve been binge watching ever since. Sending good vibes🙌🏼🤘🏼💜🥰🤗
I'm so ready for the pandemic to lift so I can resume my journey of connecting with new people face-to-face and build connections without feeling like I have to be handicapped by social anxiety. Thank you for the video <3
You are an awesome person, I enjoy your channel a lot 💜. Thankyou for the great content.
One of my most favorite videos from you! I really like when you open up about this kind of stuff!
Thanks for being so real about this and everything else. You are truly a rarity as far as social media goes and that is really amazing. I have struggled with similar issues in the past and can relate to what you are saying. You are inspiring and have made me research how to begin posting content to my own channel. Keep being yourself and being real.
I never knew you had a cat 🐈 lol I have two. Their the best !
This was such a relatable and comforting video!
How do you adjust to being alone and having absolutely no friends?
I only feel socially awkward when everybody talks about things I mostly have no interest in.
Fun fact: You can still be productive and also get sauced at parties
Thank you!
I’ve struggled a lot with social anxiety over the years too so I completely relate. Except I disagree with the high school thing. I would barely talk to people in high school but now that I’m out I find I have to do more things by myself so it’s gotten my confidence up more than in high school where my parents did everything for me
This was an awesome video. I can relate to this a lot. I hope you do more like this.
Go graham